The erotic, sexual connection. It lives, it dies, and it is reborn. Or not. What aspect of a relationship is more mysterious than this? Where do trust and anger and adoration and need live most directly between you and your partner?
Perhaps we marry for romance. Perhaps we marry for security. Perhaps we marry to start a family. Perhaps we marry because it is time to do so. Perhaps we marry to show up our closest friends. Perhaps we marry because we have found our soul mate. Ultimately we end up in the bed naked with the person we have married, no matter what got us there and no matter what we imagine marriage to be about. Then what?
Over time you and your partner will undoubtedly notice that your levels of desire don’t always match. You want to, he doesn’t. You are in the mood for something wild and aggressive when he wants to linger and go slow. How do we meet in the middle? How do we even know what our partners are in the mood for? Do we dare ask? Do we offer silent clues? If you already developed your own language, some combination of talking, gesturing, do you like the way the communications go?
In a new relationship, sexuality is experienced elegantly or inelegantly making love. As you live together and learn each other, you see your partners sensual nature expressed in other ways like the careful way he prepares a meal or the sweet way he cares for the kids. All expressions of erotic connection to living and life. As time passes you remain with each other, the initial sexual intensity can become beautifully displaced from the bedroom into every aspect of your lives together. Being together becomes erotic.
I want you to experience love on a greater scale. A sexual desire not felt by many. In order to do this you have to dig deep. While answering the questions I proposed above, feel free to be poetic, shy, embarrassed or definite. Try to speak accurately, as earnestly as you can, as much as you are able. Go slow. Help each other out. Get down with your truth. Find satisfaction and help your partner find satisfaction.
Try this exercise, it does wonders in and out of the bedroom 😉